Episode 208

Lost Continent
image ** Joel tries to get the bots ready for the film likes it’s the big game. For the invention exchange Frank invents some exercise equipment, a portable treadmill, a row boat and some stairs. Dr F is pretty annoyed but then remembers how bad the movie is. Joel wants to show his invention but is forced into the theater against his will.

At White Sands Missile Base, a group of military personnel are watching a rocket launch. After monitoring the flight, the rocket is supposed to turn around, but it doesn’t respond to commands and it flies out of range. The group’s leader tells everyone he is really disappointed. The scene shifts to a woman’s home, where Major Joe Nolan is putting the moves on a Miss Marla Stevens. Just as Nolan plants a big kiss on her, there is someone at the door. Oh no, the Major is needed back at the base, pronto. image Next we see the Major and his copilot, Lt. Danny Wilson, flying out over the ocean. With them are a group of scientists, Doctors Phillips, Rostov and Briggs as well as Sgt. Tatlow. They are looking for the missing rocket.

** Break
** Joel is trying to tell a joke when another ship comes up next to them. It’s Hugh Beaumont and he’s going to wipe out all of human life. Luckily Joel and the bots talk him out of it.

Out over the Pacific, the plane suddenly starts experiencing trouble and it’s forced to land on a small island. Tatlow breaks out the weapons and they all start looking for the rocket. Not quite sure what makes them think the rocket is on this island but off they go. They tramp through the jungle until they come to a village. A native woman tells them all the other villagers left for another island when the rocket crashed on top of the sacred mountain. She shows them how to get to the mountain but refuses to go with them. The mountain is pretty steep and is shrouded in clouds. Unable to see the top, they start climbing. And climbing and climbing and climbing. They get a long way up the mountain, when they run into a cloud of poisonous gas. They decide to stop for the night in a small alcove as a storm starts raging. Dr. Briggs, is really struggling and is not sure if he can make it.

** Break
** Joel and the bots put on a show called “The Explores”, with white man Joel trying to exploit the natives, Crow and Tom.

Morning comes and it’s time for more rock climbing. After a while, Briggs can’t make it any further. He loses his grip and over the side he goes. image Everyone is really bummed out. Then it time for more rock climbing. Finally they reach the top and discover a lush prehistoric forest. Since they can’t climb any more they start walking and walking. They see a few foot prints and realize they are from a brontosoraurs and then they see one. It starts to chase them and Dr Phillips is forced to climb a tree. Wilson and Nolan fire their weapons at the beast. Luckily they all escape. After that, they find a place to camp out for the night. Day breaks and Nolan notices Rostov and Phillips are gone. A quick search and they find them. Phillips leg is wedged in some rocks. There is also a triceratops roaming nearby. Another one shows up and it’s time dino fighting. They are able to get Phillips lose and they bid a hasty retreat. 

** Break
** Joel and the bots are looking out the window at something cool. Dr. F doesn’t think it’s cool but Frank does.

More walking ensues as well as an occasional rest period. Suddenly there is the rocket. Oh no, more dinosaurs. They can’t get to the rocket. They start firing their guns to distract the creatures. Rostov and Phillips head to the rocket and retrieve the data recorder. No one notices a triceratops has gotten behind Tatlow. He quickly becomes a dino snack.

With only four of them left, it’s time to start climbing down. So that means more climbing. Sudden the mountain starts to tremble and shake. Rocks start falling and are ragtag group high tails it down the mountain. They reach the bottom and the whole island starts coming apart. They find one of the native’s boats and paddle away. They finally are safe, adrift in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

** Joel and the bots share a few facts about the movie. Frank wants to reward them for making through the movie. That’s not going to happen.

Cesar Romero (Nolan) was active in film and television from the 1930’s until the 1980’s. One of his most famous roles is the Joker from the Batman TV series in the 1960’s

Chick Chandler (Wilson) appeared in more than 130 films from 1925 through the mid-1950’s.

John Hoyt (Rostov) was a long time character actor. He appeared in the 1955 film Blackboard Jungle.

Sid Melton (Tatlow) made regular appearances on Green Acres and Make Room for Daddy

Whit Bissell (Briggs) was a regular in B movies throughout the 1950’s

Hugh Beaumont (Phillips) starred as Ward Cleaver on Leave It to Beaver

Best Riffs
“You are a… cynical, suspicious man, aren’t you, Nolan?” NO, I’M NOT. Who told you that?

‘These tracks are fresh.’ “Mountain Cows…nothing scarier!”

“Now, this is only for conversation, but if you were gonna eat a human body, where would you start?”

Really bad movie but I enjoyed this episode. 3 out of 5.

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