Episode 304

Gamera vs Barugon

** Tom Servo and Crow are having a little debate about Mac vs PC.
For the invention exchange Joel makes an animatronic soda can to promote recycling. Dr Forrester and Frank make a disco bubble cumber bun.

The film starts with a flashback to the first movie. After Gamera was launched in to space, his rocket was struck by a meteor. Now free of the rocket, Gamera returns to earth. He heads to a hydroelectric power station to get some fuel and then he bashes in the dam. Just like that he flies away to look for a volcano to get more fuel.
Meanwhile, a man named Kano tells his brother and two others about a huge opal he hid in a cave in the jungles of New Guinea during World War 2.

He can’t go get it because of an injury so he decides to send his brother Keisuke and the two others, Kawajiri and Onodera, to get it. They plan on selling it and becoming filthy rich. Using fake documents they board a cargo ship that will take them there and then search the jungle for the opal. On board the ship they pretend to be crew members to blend in.
The boat gets to New Guinea and Keisuke flies the three of them via helicopter inland to a village. When they arrive they find a Japanese man, Dr. Matsushita , living with the villagers. He and the villagers warn the men to stay away from the cave because an evil spirit lives there. Nonsense they say and head off into the jungle.

** Break
** Joel and the bots show off their new monsters action set, complete with army men, ambulances and much more so you can destroy Tokyo just like in the movies.

The men locate the cave and begin scrounging around. Sure enough Kawajiri finds the opal. He and Keisuke (Kōjirō Hongō) are excited but Onodera doesn’t seem to be. He sees a scorpion crawling up Kawajiri’s leg but doesn’t tell him. It stings Kawajiri and he collapses and dies. Onodera takes the opal but Keisuke makes him give him their gun. He doesn’t seem to trust Onodera. He was right to think that. Onodera lights a couple sticks of dynamite and throws them in the cave. The explosion traps Keisuke in the cave. Now Onodera has the opal to himself.
Keisuke wakes up and he’s in the village. One of the villagers, Karen, tells him they found him just in time. Onodera is long gone with the opal. Karen and Dr Matsushita tell him that it’s not an opal.

The legend says that great harm will come to many if it is not returned. Karen wants to go to Japan to warn everyone.
Onodera re-boards the ship from earlier and heads back to Japan. He hides the opal but accidentally exposes it to infrared light. It turns out the opal is actually an egg. The egg hatches and a lizard comes out of it. A little while later, the boat reaches the harbor. Kano is on the dock waiting.

All of a sudden the ship begins to thrash about and a fire erupts on board. Everyone jumps overboard and is rescued. Kano searches for his brother. He finds Onodera who tells him his brother and Kawajiri are dead and the opal sank with the ship. Just then a giant lizard comes out of the water and begins destroying everything.

** Break
** Tom and Crow pretend to be ladies out having lunch while Joel is their waiter.

Back at Kano’s home, he and Onodera try to decide how to get the opal. They need a diver but the giant lizard is closing in on them. Kano wants to wait but Onodera doesn’t. He thinks they should get it now after he has taken so many risks to get it. He lets slip that he killed the other two men and Kano attacks him. Onodera is able to overpower him and leaves him for dead.
Meanwhile the big reptile is smashing up the city. The military fires away at it with as many tanks as they can get. The lizard sticks out its tongue and uses its freeze breath to cover everything in ice.

It even freezes the fighter jets that they attack it with. Running out of options, the military decides to fire long range misses at it. Before they can be fired, the lizard fires a giant rainbow from his back all the way to the missile base. It destroys all the missiles. Gamera is attracted to the Rainbow and he comes flying in. The lizard freezes him as well.
Keisuke and Karen arrive in Japan. When she sees the lizard on the news she says it’s Barugon and she knows how to stop it. Keisuke and Karen (Kyōko Enami) look for his brother then end up at Onodera’s place. It’s fight time again. This time Onodera loses and they tie him up to a post. Keisuke’s arm is injured in the fight and Karen sucks on the wound which makes it feel better??? Anyhow, they leave and go to the defense ministry. She tells them Barugon is attracted to diamonds and she has one that should do the trick. It’s a 5000 karat diamond.

They can use it to lure it to a lake and drown him.
Onodera is freed from his bonds by his wife. She tells him about the diamond from the news. He makes up his mind to go get it.
Keisuke and Karen fly the diamond over Barugon. He seems interested for a while but then turns away. The plan failed. Turns out the infrared light he was exposed to makes him not so interested in shiny things. If they expose the diamond to the light it should get its attention. They spray Barugon with water since it can’t move when wet.
They put the diamond in an experimental death ray and drive it out to where Barugon is. They turn it on and the great lizard starts to follow them. Onodera sees all this happening. He jumps in his car to go after the diamond.

** Break
** Joel and the bots are sitting around on some lawn chairs. Joel tells the bots about going to the drive in movies back on earth. Tom wants to know why no big stars are in the Gamera movie. Joel says the movie is full of famous actors but he gets a little carried away showing them.

They lure Barugon to the lake.

Just then Onodera shows up. He pulls out a gun and takes the diamond. As he drives away, Barugon attacks and swallows him and the diamond.
Just when all hope seems lost, Keisuke discovers that mirrors are not affected by Barugon’s rainbow beams. They device a plan to make a giant mirror and then reflect its beam back at it. With the mirror ready they start firing at Barugon to make it fire its rainbow. Sure enough the plan works and the reflected ray hits Barugon but it doesn’t kill him. It won’t make that mistake again. Turns out the plan didn’t work after all.
While this is going on Gamera finally thaws out and he’s not happy. He finds Barugon and a fight ensues. Gamera bites into Barugon and drags him under water. Finally Barugon is defeated. Gamera flies away in victory.
Everyone is happy except Keisuke. He is feeling ashamed and alone. His greed caused all this. He tells Karen he’ll take her back to her village. Karen tells him he’s not alone.

** The bots want to know why Gamera got top billing even though he was barely in the movie. Joel says Gamera worked behind the camera more on this film. He then shows them a bunch of books about behind the scenes of the movie. Frank picked out a book for Dr. Forrester to read at the beach. It’s the un-cut version of Steven King’s The Stand.

It so heavy it knocks him over.

Kōjirō Hongō appeared in two other Gamera movies

Kyōko Enami has appeared in over 100 Japanese movies and TV shows.

## Best Riffs
It’s a skittles commercial

Whatever you do don’t hit the inflatable reindeer

What! are they at a Columbo try out

I found this episode to be a bit of a dud. The movie was boring and the riffing was only so-so. I give it 2 out of 5.

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