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Episode 307

Daddy-o
(Alphabet Antics)

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** Joel and the bots are hanging around the water cooler chating.
Dr Forrester is feeding the “baby” from last week’s show, so Joel goes first with the Invention Exchange. He made a mobile out of air fresheners. Dr F made a alien face hugger teething nook.

First up is a quick short – Alphabet Antics.
This was just a quick run through the alphabet with images for each letter.

Daddy-O
A truck driver is heading down a curvy highway when a little sports car nearly runs him off the road. The trucker follows the car which continues driving poorly. He finally has had enough and forces the driver to pull over. He jumps out of his truck ready to tear into the lousy driver but a young blond woman steps out of the car. A couple of men come over to see what’s going on.
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The young lady claims the trucker is the bad driver and has been flirting with her. Trucker boy is pissed and eventually the two head their separate ways.
Turns out the trucker is named Phil. He heads for a local club to meet some friends for drinking and dancing. While there, guess who walks in? The young lady from first scene. Her name is Jana and one of Phil’s friends knows her and introduces them. Of course Phil wants nothing to do with her.
The band convinces Phil (Dick Contino) to come up and sing a song. Turns out Phil is quite the crooner. While this is going on, in walks two men who obviously don’t fit in with the crowd. They head for the bar and start looking around the room. They seem to be eyeballing Sonny, another of Phil’s friends.

** Break
** Joel and the bots sing the “Pants Up” song inspired by how high Phil has his pants in the movie.
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Frank really digs the song. Dr F – not so much

Phil finishes the song and sits back down with his crew. Jana was only mildly impressed with his singing. She asks him to dance. He is still pretty steamed about earlier but agrees to the dance. All they do is bicker with each other until Jana dances with someone else.
After the dance they start at it again. Seems Phil is not just a singing truck driver, he is also a drag racer. Jana challenges him to a race which he gladly accepts. Loser has to buy a whole pizza.  They all head out except for Sonny. He tells Phil to hold on to a key for him then he slips out the back to avoid the bad guys. He gets to his car and takes off but the bad are right behind him. The chase is on. Sonny somehow loses control and rolls his car down a steep embankment. Of course it bursts into flames.
Jana, Phil and the rest all reach the starting line for the big race through the park. Remember, this for a pizza. Off they go.
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It’s neck and neck for the first little while until Jana cuts him off and takes the lead. Phil nearly hits the night watchman. Jana makes it to the pizza shop first. Everyone is stunned. When Phil shows up he is really pissed and is worried he will get in trouble if the watchman got his license. Sure enough he did. Well its pizza time for now.
The police show up and find Phil. They take him in for questioning. They charge him with several crimes including manslaughter. They think he caused Sonny’s car to go over the side. Later he is found guilty of the lesser charges and loses his license for a year. He also loses his truck driving job. The police Sargent tries to offer him a job. Phil’s not so sure.
Phil decides to try and figure out how Sonny got killed. He gets a ride to Jana’s house. He’s sure she caused the accident and confronts her but it turns out he’s wrong. The two of them start working together to solve the mystery. The key Sonny gave him is for a locker at Bruce’s gym. They head there and Phil tries to go to the lockers. He is stopped by Bruce. Wouldn’t you know it, it’s one of the bad guys from scene two. Phil doesn’t know it so he leaves the key with the nearsighted bad guy so he can clean out the locker.
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** Break
** Tom and Crow recreate their own version of the big race from the movie.

Phil and Jana sneak back into the gym after hours. Bruce and the other bad guy, Sidney,  are just about to open Sonny’s locker. They find something in there but Phil and Jana can’t see what it was.
The next day, Phil is at the club where he sang before. He’s telling a friend how he’s still out of work. In walks Sidney. He saddles up to Phil and tells him he might be able to get him some work. Seems Sidney has a new night club he is opening and needs a singer. Phil agrees to check the place out. Sidney sends his manicurist to pick him up. She is very smitten with Phil.
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At the new club, Sidney (Bruno VeSota) shows Phil around. Bruce is there. He is Sidney’s personal masseur. Sidney offers Phil the job and even gives him a car and a fake drivers license. Phil accepts.
Phil heads home when Jana shows up. She was lonely and really wanted to see Phil. They share a passionate kiss. Later Phil clues her in on his new job. He has to make sure no one knows who he is so he comes up with a new stage name – Daddy-O.
Opening night at the club is a huge success. Daddy-O knocks them dead.
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During a break, Phil gets word that Jana is in Sidney’s office. He storms in and finds Jana is going to become a cigarette girl. Phil tells Jana to leave but she refuses. He storms off in anger. Time for more singing. Jana comes in with her smokes which only makes Phil even angrier. He starts singing a song to the manicurist and give a big kiss at the end of the song. Jana (Sandra Giles) is not sure what to make of Phil.
Later Sidney has a talk with Phil. He has a package that needs to be delivered and he needs Phil and his great driving skills to deliver it. He gives him $750 to do it. Phil makes the delivery which really pleases Sidney.

** Break
** Joel is showing the bots what a spit take is when another spaceship runs into them. It’s nearsighted Bruce from the film and he wants the the gym key.
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Later Sidney needs Phil to make another delivery. Phil drives to the spot, throws the package out the window and prepares to head back. Oh no, its the cops. They chase after him. Only through some fancy driving is Phil able to escape. The bad guys that were supposed to be getting the packages are upset that one of them didn’t arrive. Those guys grab Phil so they can have a little talk with him. They drive him to a warehouse and work him over. They are looking for some drugs. Turns out they have the wrong guy. They dump him outside Sidney’s office. Jana just happens to be there. She helps him to his feet and cleans him up. Phil has figured out who killed Sonny. He was double crossing Sidney so they ran him off the road that night.
Phil and Jana follow Sidney to find out where he is getting the drugs from. While snooping around Bruce catches them and he has a gun. Back at the night club Sidney tells Phil he has to pick up some money. Bruce (Jack McClure) will go with him and Jana will stay at the club to make sure Phil does as he is told.
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Phil and Bruce get the money and start heading back. On the way, Bruce has Phil stop the car and get out. Phil swipes Bruce’s glasses so he can’t see and a fist fight ensues. With Bruce unable to see, Phil wins the battle. He heads back to the club but stops and calls the police first. He arrives at the club but he doesn’t have the money. It fell on the ground during the fight. Sidney has locked Jana in his sauna and turned the heat up. He demands the money. Phil tries to rescue Jana but Sidney takes a shot at him so he makes a run for it. He hides in the wine cellar as Sidney stalks him.
Somehow Bruce makes it back to the club and grabs a spare pair of glasses from the desk. He hears Jana in the sauna and gets her out. He makes her drive back so he can look for the money.
The police set up a road block and are able to capture Bruce.
Meanwhile Phil sneaks up on Sidney and knocks him out. The police and Jana get to the club and find Phil.
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Everyone at the club wants to hear Phil sing. Thankfully the movie ends before that can happen.

** Joel liked the scene where Phil slapped an apple out of Jana’s hand so he and the bots do their own version of it. Frank does the same with Dr Forrester.

Dick Contino is an accordionist and singer and appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show 48 times.
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Sandra Giles appeared in small rolls in several movies and TV shows in the fifities and sixties.
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Bruno VeSota appeared in many sci-fi films in the fifities and early sixties including Attack of the Giant Leeches and The Wild World of Batwoman. He also directed a few as well. He played the barman in a number of episodes of Bonanza.
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Jack “Tipp” McClure had an uncredited role in Some Like It Hot and made several appearances in TV shows through the sixties.
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Best Riffs
## “It only hurts when I breathe.” Then don’t breathe.
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## Say! Those pants are kinda’ high aren’t they?!?
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## “No one has ever beaten him through that before!”
Well no one else has ~these
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## “Let’s see: Jockstrap, ‘nother jockstrap… This guy really liked jockstraps!”
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This was a really good episode. The short is a little week but the movie is at least watchable. 4 out of 5.

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Episode 306

Time of the Apes
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** It’s baseball season on the Satellite of Love and Joel turns Tom into a batting tee. He hits the ball and puts a hole in the ship’s hull. Gypsy has to patch it. She scolds them for playing ball in the house. As soon as she leaves Joel hits it again. This time Crow catches it.
For the Invention Exchange Joel invents the cellulite phone which reminds you to stop dialing and start dieting. Frank invents Miracle Baby Growth Wonder Formula. It turns a toddler into a full grown man in seconds.

Little Johnny is having some breakfast with his mother. His father comes to join them. There is a knock at the door. It’s Caroline. She and Johnny are going to visit his uncle at his laboratory. Suddenly there is a mild earth quake. Johnny’s parents want him to stay home but he doesn’t care and is determined to spend some time with his gal pal, so he and Caroline head off anyway.
At the lab they meet up with Catherine, who shows them around. Johnny’s uncle shows up and he takes them to see the cold experiment they are working on. They are cryogenically freezing monkeys. He thaws one out to show them how simple it is. They have even done this with people. Catherine takes the kids to show them the chambers used for humans. Uh oh, the nearby volcano starts erupting and everything in the lab beings shaking. The three hide in some of the freezing chambers as the building starts crumbling down around them. Wouldn’t you know it, a boulder hits the control lever and our heroes are put into a deep freeze.
The three wake up on some exam tables in the same room. They start looking around the facility but nothing seems normal. They open a door and suddenly there is a bunch of apes in lab coats. Of course this freaks them out and they take off running. It’s no use as the apes capture them and tie them to a tree.
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What appears to be the head ape comes along and has them blindfolded. They are then taken to a desolate area with a bunch of human bones lying around. The three decide to make a run for it. Despite the fact the apes have guns, did I mention before they have guns, well anyway, the three manage to get away. They find a house and slip inside. There is a young ape in there but it is not afraid of them.

** Break
** Joel and the bots show some clips from the film and ask “why doesn’t Johnny care”?

Soon the apes find them and chase them some more. When they pass by some sort of statue the apes stop dead in their tracks. Apparently our heroes are heading towards Green Mountain,  which scares the apes. More soldiers are called out to look for the humans. Johnny, Caroline and Catherine continue running through the mountainous jungle. They get past a couple of traps before Caroline gets caught in a net. Johnny climbs up the tree to try and cut her loose. Suddenly there is another human and he has a gun. His name is Godo. He also has a knife so he cuts Caroline down and takes them to his home. It’s a lovely cave in the mountains. Godo does not remember seeing any other humans yet he seems to be able to converse easily with our trio.
The apes continue the hunt. Most of them are very afraid but their commander keeps pushing them onward.
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Godo decides to shave off his beard to look more civilized and to impress Catherine. Just then the little ape from earlier comes in. It’s name is Pepe and it warns them that the apes are getting close. Godo runs off with his rifle to see what he can do. The apes have set some fires to try and smoke them out. Godo and the apes exchange some gun fire but the smoke forces him and the others to make a run for it.
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It’s no use as the apes are able to corner them.
The apes are well aware of Godo and prepare a firing squad to finally kill him. At that moment the top ape shows up. He orders the execution stopped. Godo tries to rush him but the ape stops him with a crushing blow to the head and down goes Godo. For some reason a flying saucer appears in the sky just then. Not the least bit interested in it, the head honcho orders all of the humans to be brought back to headquarters. He tells Catherine that as long as they cooperate they will not be harmed.

** Break
** Joel and the bots do a dramatization of the scopes monkey trial with Gypsy as the defendant and a cardboard cutout if Judge Wapner presiding.

The apes put Godo in an electrified escape proof room while the others are put in a room by themselves. Pepe somehow gets into the facility. Pepe crawls through the air vents to the trios room. Pepe and Johnny then crawl around until they find Godo. Just then then commander ape comes in their room. He has waited a long time to take out Godo and prepares to shoot him.
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He turns of the electrical field and walks toward Godo. That’s when Johnny drops down out of the vent on to his back. Godo beats the tar out of the commander and the three of them make their escape. They hide out in the back of a truck until some soldiers hop in with them. The truck drives into town and the three are able to slip away. Meanwhile the apes interrogate Caroline and Catherine to find out where the others have gone but they have no idea.
Godo, Johnny and Pepe start working their way back to the base to rescue the girls. Along the way they see the flying saucer from earlier. It seems to be taking pictures. They are not sure what the make if it. Is it watching over them or what?  Anyway, they continue on toward the base. They sneak in and get to the girls and a tearful reunion ensues.
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They all escape but are soon surrounded. There is that flying saucer again. This time the apes decide to blast it out if the sky. The saucer emits some kind of ray which renders all of their guns useless. Our heroes are able to get to a jeep drive away. The flying saucer makes another visit so they decide to follow it to try and contact it.
First they take Pepe home to her mother. That’s right; Pepe was girl ape the whole time. Later they run into the ape commander again. He and Godo engage in a serious firefight. Oh no, Godo is out of bullets.

** Break
** Joel and the bots put on a mock newscast. Crow has the fashion minute complete with clips of all the clothing worn by the apes in the movie.

The ape commander is ready to finish off Godo, when the flying saucer shows up again and disables the commander’s gun. He pleads with them to let him kill Godo. He claims Godo killed his wife and son. The saucer lands and shows a video of Godo trying to save them. The commander is devastated by this and wanders away in shame. The top ape shows up and tries to convince the humans to come back with him but they decide to move on.
They work their way through the mountains and see the saucer land behind a rock formation. They try to find it but only find a metal door in the mountain.
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The door suddenly opens so they go inside. It closes behind them forcing them to deeper into the mountain. A funky light show starts and just like that, Caroline wakes up in a bed in some strange room. She opens a door a steps out into the hallway. She starts searching for the others. She and Catherine find each other and try to figure out what the hell is going on and what to do next. Just then several figures appear at the end of the hallway. They’re worried it the apes again but it turns out to just be several human scientist. They are back at the lab. They were cryogenically frozen the whole time. Catherine asks about Johnny and Godo. Johnny is in the other room they tell her but they don’t know anything about someone named Godo. Catherine finds a pendant Godo was wearing in one of the freezing chambers. Caroline and Johnny are then reunited with their parents.
Dr Lee, one of the scientists, tells Carolina that it took seven days for the rescuers to get them out of the lab. Caroline tells them about all that happened to them and that it had all lasted 6 months. Dr Lee gives her some mumbo-jumbo explanation above cold temperatures and time shifting to make sense of it.
Later, Catherine is out with the children. They want to know what happened to Godo. Catherine tells them he is on another time line but will always be in their hearts.

** Joel and the bots sing the Sandy Frank song. Dr Forrester and Frank are trying to decide who should push the button and who should change the giant baby’s diaper. The baby pushes the button.

Cast
Garrick Hogan (the voice of Godo) played Briggs in the original Star Wars.

Best Riffs
## Colonel Sanders!! What happened?
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## The King of the Apes rides in style in a new Buick Skylark.
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## I’m no good until I get a cup of coffee.
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Not a great episode. This was originally a Japanese TV show and was turned into a movie for American audiences to try and capitalize on the popularity of the Plant of the Apes movie. The movie is really bad and a little difficult to get into. 2 out of 5.

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