Uncategorized

Episode 314

Mighty Jack
image

** There seems to be some sort of emergency on the ship. Lights are flashing and Joel and the bots are a mess. Joel passes out and Tom and Crow aren’t sure what to do. Turns out it was just a hoax. Dr Forrester and Frank invented formal flippers for the secret agent on the go. Joel invents ear muffs that look like ears.

A narrator explains that an organization know as “Q” is trying to take over the world. In response the United Nations formed a special group called Mighty Jack to stop them.
In Paris, Harold Atari finishes off his drink then leaves the bar and starts driving away. Down the road, two police officers stop his car. Suddenly a helicopter with a hugh net scoops up his car. A voice comes over Mr Atari’s radio and tells him there is no escape and to just relax. It appears Q has kidnapped him.
Colonel Yabooki’s secretary tells him about the kidnapping so he contacts Mighty Jack to help locate Mr Atari. Atari is unaware he has a transponder in his suit. Hopefully he will find it and activate it so they can find him. Sure enough he finds it and starts sending the signal. An odd looking airplane is flying around trying to pick it up. Just as they start receiving the signal another odd looking plane starts firing at it. The first plane goes into a steep dive and goes into the ocean. It’s also a submarine.
image

Meanwhile on a nearby ship, they are also listen for the signal. They hear it and figure our where it’s coming from. The bad guys, that’s Q, also hear the signal so they destroy the transmitter. So then the submarine plane flies back up and lands on some sort of giant aircraft carrier in the sky. Also a group of people people that I don’t have any idea who they are but have figured out where Atari us, put in a call to Mighty Jack.
Q starts questioning Atari. They put him inside a big cylinder that has really bright lights inside that can blind him. They ask him about Mighty Jack but he keeps his eyes closed and refuses to tell them anything. They turn up the lights to full brightness and he finally agrees to talk.

** Break
** Crow and Tom put together a commercial for Mighty Jack dog food.
image

The Colonel’s secretary is on the roof of her office building. She is sending a secret transmission to Q. Another lady over hears her. Later she visits the Colonel and tips him off to her treachery. She also find a listening device in his office.
Then we see the group from earlier who don’t seem to have any connection to anything. I still don’t know who they are but the are very distressed about the kidnapping.
Back on the submarine plane, a call comes in to Mighty Jack. It’s Q. They have a nuclear missile aimed at them. They are prepared to turn over Atari in exchange for Mighty Jack. Mighty Jack is not sure if they should, so Q says they will ask Yabooki what he thinks.
His secretary comes into his office with a gun and tells him to make the exchange. Then the other lady sticks a gun in her back.
image

The secretary drops her gun but takes off running. The other lady follows her to the roof again. Trapped, the secretary suddenly explodes. Q must of done it somehow.
So the subplane is near the island that Atari is being held on. One of the Mighty Jack crew scuba dives out to the island. He starts sneaking around the big house then calls back to the subplane about what he has seen. Another member of the team then swims over. The first guy finds Atari. The two wait in a room for the second guy to arrive.  Just as he does, Q starts pumping poison gas into the room. Second guy busts open the door and the three of them take. Before they leave they set off an explosive in the control room. They make it safely back to the subplane which turns back into a plane and takes off. Q starts firing a bunch of missiles at them. They fire back and drop a bunch of bombs on them.
image

More bombs. More explosions. Blah, blah. Mighty Jack wins but Q is able to escape.
Back at headquarters, the crew are all waiting on the subplane thing. Everyone is confused about who this Atari guy is. Just then in walks Yabooki and Atari. Turns out Atari is really a colonel and he is the new leader of Mighty Jack.

** Break
** Tom and Crow force Joel into a cylinder with really bright lights inside just like in the movie. They try to trick him into looking at the lights but he just keeps his eyes closed.

Sometime later, Atari gets a call from Yabooki. Q is back and they have destroyed an installation with some top secret government military thingy or whatever. Time for Mighty Jack to go to work.
They sail and fly to the artic and figure out where Q is. They are is some sort of iceberg. Divers are sent out and there are some torpedoes and lasers fired and one of the divers is hurt and they bring them back in.
Suddenly, we are back at Yabooki’s office. Atari is there and so is the secretary killing lady.
image

Yabooki gives them a report that Q has developed a type of ice that doesn’t melt. They must have infiltrated the government’s research center to figure out how to do it. Of course Q has the office bugged again and hears the whole thing.
A couple Q thugs go after Catherine, the lady from earlier, but some guy rescues her. She recognizes him as some sort of political writer. She eventually makes it back to Mighty Jack.
Next we see a coffee shop of sorts. A man walks in and the sales girl tries to help him. He is a reporter named Roberto and all the members of Mighty Jack are in the shop. He wants to write a story about them. Suddenly a shot is fired from a building across the street. It hits Roberto in the arm but otherwise everyone is okay. A couple of team members run to the building to try catch the shooter but he gets away. They find a bullet he left behind that is made of the same ice stuff.
image

They take it to Yabooki. Turns out Roberto is an agent of Q. They decide to go see the scientist that was working on the hot ice for the government. They are not sure if he is working for Q also. Atari and one of the other Mighty Jack guys go and see this scientist fellow. He tells them all of his research was stolen a while back but he doesn’t know who did it. They go and see another scientist. He also had his work stolen. Now they really need to find out who has been stealing all these papers.
Q of course has been spying on all this. They kidnaps Catherine. Then he sends a signal to one of his agents to get the first scientist. The agent is the scientist’s son. He kidnaps him.
Then we see Roberto with the coffee shop girl, Mary. The two of them head over to the scientist’s apartment.

** Break
** Turn out that Crow’s screen play, Earth vs Soup, is getting some attention in Hollywood so Joel tries to do a big pitch to some producers. He thinks it should be underwater but kind of gets carried away with with everything.

Roberto and Mary find some sort of mechanical device used for making the hot ice stuff. The agent that is also one of the scientist’s son comes in and takes the device from them at gun point.
image

Atari and company show up but just too late catch them. They find out where the device is being taken so they all head for the harbor.
Agent guy gets there first. He and another guy takes Catherine to Mighty Jack headquarters. There they are able to gain access to Mighty Jack’s special secret stuff so they freeze the subplane’s cooling system.  Meanwhile Atari confronts Roberto about being agent for Q. Roberto quickly kills himself by blowing himself up. Atari finds the kidnapped scientist and they free him. Are you confused yet?
A couple of the Mighty Jack crew get into a gun battle with the two agent guys. They kill one but the other tries to make a run for it. When they corner him guess what he does? That’s right he blows himself up.
image

Catherine informs Atari that Q is going to use the freeze weapon and destroy an island.
Now on the subplane, the crew finds Q at the iceberg. They prepare to blast them but the engine starts to overheat. The crew frantically work and get it to cool down then they start the attack. For several minutes we see rockets fired and we see a bunch of explosions as the iceberg takes hit after hit. Finally Q is defeated. Time for Mighty Jack to go home.

Joel and the bots sing a song called “Slow the Plot Down”, which sound a lot like “Blow the Man Down”. They each try to think of a scene they like from the movie but come up empty.
image

Dr Forrester is annoyed by them but Frank gets into the spirt.

Best Riffs
## Ah, here we are at PLOT RECOVERY….
image

## Open the Venetian blinds!
image

## She is a lean mean lime green fighting machine!
image

This movie was very hard to watch. It’s confusing, boring and none of the characters are interesting. The riffs were okay and the closing song is terrific. Never the less this was not one I want to see again. 1 out of 5

Uncategorized

Episode 313

Earth vs the Spider
(With the short Speech – using your voice)
image

** Crow has a talk show called “Inside the Robot Mind” and his guest is Tom Servo. The show doesn’t go very far because the two of them keep complimenting each other. The Mads invention is a cheese phone but they stole the idea from Joel. He invents a cd player hair dryer so he can blow dry his hair while blowing his mind.

A young salesman is trying to convince a customer to make a purchase. He rambles on very quickly and loses the sale. A man then explains that many sales are lost because of poor speech. He says that you need to be heard, understood and pleasing.
image

We then see several examples of poor public speaking. The man says each of these people’s problem can be traced back to carelessness. This is followed by closeups of people’s mouths speaking as well as examples of proper speaking. The man finishes up with some more advice on using your speaking voice properly.

——————-

A man is driving a pickup truck down a highway at night. He picks up a gift box from the seat. In it is a bracelet for his daughter, Carol. Suddenly he sees something in the road. The man slams on his brakes but he is struck in the face by what ever it was and crashes his truck.
The next day Carol is walking to school when her friend Mike comes up to her. He hands her a gift.
image

It’s Carol’s birthday. Carol is worried since her father didn’t come home last night. Mike tries to reassure her that nothing is wrong since it isn’t the first time he hasn’t come home. Carol doesn’t take kindly to the implication and tells Mike to take his present back. She runs off in a huff to class.
Later the two of them are in Mr. Kingman’s science class. Carol isn’t mad at Mike anymore so she asks him to help look for her father. They borrow a friends car and drive along the same highway after school. The come across some sort of rope attached to a tree and some broken glass in the road. Carol (June Kenney) finds a gift box on the ground. Its the one that her father had. Mike keeps trying to come up with explanations for what happened when they see her father’s truck down an embankment. They scramble down to take a look but there is no sign of her father.
image

Mike thinks maybe he went into a nearby cave so they start heading for it.

** Break
** Crow has written a screen play in hopes of getting rich if they ever get back to earth. It’s called “Earth vs Soup”. He gets Joel and Tom to read out some lines to see if it’s any good. Needless to say it’s not very good.

Mike walks up to the cave and finds Carol’s father’s hat. He hides it from her so she does get upset. They both start into the cave but Mike suggests he should go. Carol follows him anyway.
As they head in deeper, Carol calls for her dad. Her yelling causes a stalactite to break loose. It nearly slams into her. Luckily Mike pulled her out of the way. They continue on and come across several full human skeletons.
image

Carol can’t bear the thought that one might be her dad so they keep looking. Just a little further they both fall off a ledge into a giant net but this net is kind of sticky. It’s like the rope they found earlier. Suddenly they hear some strange noises. Then they see it. A giant tarantula and it’s coming right at them. They scramble their way out of what is now obviously a web and high tail it out of there.
They take a piece of the web to Mr. Kingman’s house. He and his wife are not sure of what make of the kids story. Mr. Kingman calls sheriff Cagle. He is already aware of the spider story, since Mike and Carol had stopped there first, but he didn’t believe them.
image

Kingman (Ed Kemmer) convinces the sheriff to at least search the area for Carol’s father. He also tells him get a bunch of DDT just in case. Cagle thinks the whole thing is hilarious.
A large group of locals joins the sheriff to search the area near the cave. Mike, Carol and Kingman are there as well as some pest control guys. Everyone heads into the cave and starts searching. After a few minutes the sheriff starts mocking the whole proceedings. He gets everyone laughing except for Kingman. He thinks there is something in the cave. He mentions there are no birds or other animals in the cave. Just then a bat flies over head so Cagle, being a good sheriff, fires several shots at. Down comes the bat. In your face science boy.
image

Mike (Eugene Persson) and Carol walk ahead of the group a bit. Carol lets out a scream and everyone comes running. It’s her father and he is very dead. Dispite the fact that all the blood has been sucked out from his body, the sheriff still doesn’t think it’s the work of a spider. He and Kingman try to find the web those crazy kids said they saw. When he sees it, Cagle (Gene Roth) calls for the DDT. They start spraying the area which brings the spider out of hiding. They turn the spray on to it as well as firing away with several guns. The tarantula is able to kill one of the deputies before it collapses dead.
As everyone leaves the cave, Carol realizes she has lost the bracelet he father had got for her. She wants to go back in and find it but she can’t since the cave is filled with DDT now. Mike says he will bring her back later to look for it.
The sheriff wants to board up the entrance to the cave but Kingman wants to get a better look at the spider.
image

They bicker for a bit but Kingman gets his way. He wants to haul the thing out of there and the sheriff tells him to go right ahead.

** Break
** Joel and the bots have formed a band called the Spiders. They are dressed up and ready to rock but can’t decide what type of music to play. Suddenly another ship pulls along side them. It’s an intergalactic janitor and he not putting up with their shenanigans. When he gets called away to some other problem the gang is finally ready to rock but then it’s movie sign.

The spider is brought to the school gymnasium so Mr. Kingman can study it. While he and the principal are looking at it, one of the spiders legs moves and knocks the principal over. Kingman assures him it’s dead and it was just a twitch.
Carol is at home and she is devastated by her father’s death. Her mother tries to comfort her but Carol blames herself. If he hadn’t gone to get her that gift it never would have happened.image

Her mom says it’s time to move on and she tells her Mike called her earlier. She calls him at the movie theater his father owns and convinces him to take her back to the cave to look for the bracelet.
They head over to school to find Joe and borrow his car again. Meanwhile Joe and his band are needing to rehearse for the bid dance tomorrow but they can’t get into the gym. They con Hugo (Hank Patterson) the janitor into letting them in. image

Once they get inside and get a look at the spider, Sam, the bass player, thinks maybe they should leave. Joe gives him a razing and Sam (Skip Young) agrees to stay. They are just about ready to start playing when they hear a shriek. Hugo forgot the lock the door and now all the kids from the drama club have come in. We’ll the band starts playing so the drama kids start dancing.
The music seems to wake up the obviously not dead spider. More shrieking ensues and all the kids run out the door. Hugo comes to see what the commotion is about then rushes to the phone. He calls Kingman but the spider gets him just as he starts talking. Kingman calls the sheriff and they both head for the school. Before leaving, Kingman tells Mrs. Kingman (Sally Fraser) to stay inside with their baby.
Mike and Carol make it to the cave and head inside.
Kingman and the sheriff get to the school and see a bunch of kids running in fear. The Spider comes around the corner and Cagle fires a few shots at it but it keeps on coming.
image

Kingman jumps in his car and takes off while Cagle tries to head into a nearby business but the door is locked. It looks like the sheriff is a goner but Kingman pulls up and the sheriff jumps in. Everyone in town takes off running as the giant arachnid starts walking around.
Kingman and Cagle make it back to the sheriff’s office. He tries to call the governor for some help but he can’t get through. They send one of the deputies on a motorcycle to try and get some help.
The town is a mess after the spider is through with it. Kingman gets word that it’s heading right towards his home. He drives off after it. Sure enough it attacks his home with the misses and child inside. Kingman slams his car into it and the spider break off the attack and starts after Kingman’s car. He leads it away from town and off into the hills. He is able to give it the slip and then heads back home. He finds his wife and baby are okay. He informs the sheriff that the spider is headed south.
Mike and Carol are searching the old spider cave for her bracelet. The look around the area and finally find it. Oh joy, now they can head home. About this time the spider heads into the cave.
At the sheriff’s office, they are still waiting for help to arrive when Kingman shows up. He’s carrying the body of the deputy that went for help.
image

Guess he never made it. The sheriff remarks that he had wanted to seal up the cave. Then he glares at Kingman.
One of the residents comes in and tells them the spider is back in the cave. The sheriff orders the road foreman to get some dynamite so they can blow up the entrance. The sheriff asks Mike’s father to hold down the fort while Cagle, Kingman and some others head for the cave. After they leave the phone rings. It’s Joe from the band. He’s looking for Mike and Carol. They haven’t returned with his car yet and he is not sure where they went.

** Break
** Joel and the bots are making Creepy Crawlers. Tom wants to know why they don’t sell these anymore. Joel explains that kids would get hurt on toys like this one and they would have to stop selling them. They list a bunch of other toys that this happened to like lawn darts.

Back in the cave, Mike and Carol are having trouble finding their way out. They both are getting hungry, so Mike splits a candy bar with her. That’s when they hear that strange noise again. They run and hide before the spider gets near them. Outside, the sheriff and his crew start unloading the dynamite. Meanwhile, Mike’s father and Carol’s mom are driving around looking for the two would be spelunkers.
Mike and Carol find their way back to the giant web and start climbing through it.
image

Carol gets stuck and here comes the spider.
The dynamite is in place, so everyone clears the area. Just then the parents show up. Before they can say anything, boom goes the dynamite and that’s that.
When the dust clears they realize they are going to have to dig the two of them out, so the crew start unloading some digging supplies. Now they are worried the spider will get out again. Kingman has an idea. They can electrocute the spider using the nearby power lines. Time to get some cable.
Inside the cave, Mike and Carol are already dead having been buried in the explosion. What’s this! They’re alive. The two scramble to their feet and head for the entrance. Of course it’s now blocked. The crew outside use some more dynamite to try and blow an escape hole higher up in the cave. Mike and Carol start hollering for help and run towards the explosion. The crew outside can hear them. You know who else heard them. The not dead spider. Mike and Carol look for a place to hide.
The work crew break through and create an opening. They lower a makeshift ladder inside and climb in. They also begin lowering a bunch of the electrical cables while Kingman and the sheriff start searching for the kids. They find them but the spider is between them. They throw one of the cables over to Mike while Kingman holds the other. They turn on the juice and zap the crap out of the spider.
image

It falls down into a deeper part of the cave. Everyone climbs out of the cave to safety. The sheriff drops one last load of dynamite into the hole and seals it up for good.

** Joel had Tom and Crow do some home work on director Bert I Gordon. Tom gives a well researched report while Crow tries to tie Gordon to Orson Wells. Down in deep 13, Frank is sick from eating all the cheese.

Ed Kemmer starred in the television show Space Patrol from 1951 to 1956
image

June Kenney appeared in many low-budget films like this one through out the 1950s. 
image

Eugene Persson left acting a short time after this movie and began producing plays. He co-produced and co-created You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown in 1967.
image

Gene Roth appeared in many Three Stooges features.
image

Sally Fraser appeared in Episode 311 “It Conquered the World”
image

Skip Young played  Wally Plumstead in The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet. 
image

Hank Patterson played Hank Miller on Gunsmoke for more than a decade and Fred Ziffel on Petticoat Junction and Green Acres. His great-niece is actress Téa Leoni.
image

Best Riffs

## Carol, “Mike I’m scared of being alone”
Oh aren’t we all?
image

## It says danger weak plot ahead this means you.
image

## Dial 1-900-boring-boyfriend. He’d love to talk to you about his uncle from Milwaukee.
image

## What’s your problem?
image

## Sheriff, “You want to go for it in the truck Simpson? ”
Kinky!!!!
image

I really enjoyed this episode. The host segments were good and the riffs are really solid. The only draw back is the short which is kind of bland. If the movie, which is a great 50’s B-Movie was longer that might help. But then again there is no way this movie should be any longer. 4 out of 5.